Review: Spare by Prince Harry

January 13, 2023

Spare

by Prince Harry

// 5 stars out of 5 //

🎧: Audiobook read by Prince Harry

This book was everything I’d hoped it would be and more. It brought tears to my eyes more than once. I’m baffled by anyone who has trouble understanding Harry’s position. He’s been nothing but reasonable, rational, open and thoughtful in his desire to create a safe space for himself and his wife and children. He has been willing to admit his mistakes, regrets, privilege and biases. This isn’t a salacious tell-all. What he offers here is a scathing and relentless censure of the press, but also a pulling back of the curtain on a privileged institution that has benefited from its unquestioned authority for centuries. Whenever a group of people consider themselves above reproach, above questioning, bad things happen. Transparency is vital. When lights are turned on, roaches scatter. And Harry is turning the lights on.

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‘Spare’ corroborates a lot of feelings and theories I’ve had about the British Royal Family for a long time. Harry fills in specifics and elaborates with details and personal anecdotes, but overall I can’t say I’m particularly surprised by his revelations. Disappointed, yes. Shocked? No. It’s so sad to have proof that this family’s top priorities lay in their relationship with the British press and managing their public image. (Which they have proven time and time again to be absolutely horrendous at so why do they keep on with this nonsense??) The fact that they as a whole, as an institution, place more importance on propping up said institution than their relationships with their own family members is just so sad. Not surprising, not news, but getting actual specific examples of them doing so just reinforces my disappointment in them. (Excellent image management, guys! 👍🏼)

30+ years ago, the “Firm” repeatedly ignored Diana’s needs and requests (not to mention all the benefits and excellent PR she initially brought to the family) and to see them continuing this behavior into the next generation and beyond… it’s just mind blowing. They learned absolutely nothing. So I knew things were bad, I just didn’t know they were THIS bad. That certain people (Charles, Camilla, William, et al) were THIS oblivious. THIS ignorant. THIS self-serving.

I think Harry reveals an important piece of the puzzle here which is just how much the British press directs public “opinion,” and how much the British press (or a portion if it) is controlled by the monarchy. It all feels very Fox News. The press say something, regardless of veracity, and it instantly becomes “fact.” They suggest something and it instantly becomes “public opinion,” regardless of how the public actually feels. If they say that’s how the public feels, then that’s How They Feel™️. Bullshit has become Fact.

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I’m proud of Harry. I’m glad he left the institution that’s continually caused him pain and ignored his grief. I’m glad he’s telling the people who told him “we’ve all gone through this, you’re not special, suck it up” that maybe now is a good time for it to stop - for everyone. No one else needs to suffer. I’m also glad he has made public things his mother never could (and in ways she never could) and finally found some measure of peace with his own little family. Good for him. And I think he’s displaying quite a lot of grace by still being open to reconciling with his father and brother. Whether they’re able to reconcile or not, I hope he’s able to maintain his serenity and fulfillment.

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🎧 I read along while listening to the audiobook which is superbly read by the author himself. I highly recommend giving it a listen.